Possibly one of the funniest things i've read on here. I suspect this is what your boyfriend did. He cant focus when he is making food. And im like did you even see me. He says he often wishes it were just me and him and the whole world would disappear.
Not sure how to even approach sex. He should understand better if you say it like that. Just accepting that has made me feel a bit better and has stopped the lurching, sickening bouts of emotion that I used to suffer every couple of weeks ago. I'm glad to have found this blog, as I think I'm in the right place. To make priorities the priority. He has broken my heart and I though i suspected Aspergers from the beginning and spoke to him about it, he didnt want to see a dr. I got a similar response when I asked him about learning a recipe.
His reply: We can just talk at work? I was beside myself with pain. I understand the ladies who are married who try to work it out and commend them for this. I wish he'd been honest enough to tell me about his condition because all along I thought I was unreasonable, needy, insecure to the max and I blamed myself for the failure. If you look at the films where the sequel is considered better, they are not only vastly better films - they're also very, very different. He never took accountability for any of his actions in the relationship. I thought it was different, but interesting.
If you can, get hold of a movie called Mary and Max. I didn't want to be one of those women. But with counseling, I believe anyone can learn some measure of empathy, I'm seeing decent gains in my own partner, who has been working at it for years. In fact we usually wrote each other about three or more flirtatious love letters per week. Unknowingly, I looked at him smiling and said. Anyhow, thank you for this post.
I know one thing though: I probably need space and time to work on homework and myself more than anything at the moment. I would try to start back up with him as friends and work with him on communication skills. After 6 months I moved back with my husband, but we carried on meeting. I will automatically view them the same way. He's still in touch with me thorugh email. The rejection has caused me to search myself, which was a positive.
If a guy dumps you, he probably knows in his mind, for a while, has decided he doesn't want to be with you anymore. None of them had girlfriends and we used to go out and watch movies together. So, part of me just wanted to type that all out in some sort of cathartic move. I called him out on this, because I was totally unaware. He roared down the phone at me. I'm sure, had he been well intended towards you you would have probably forgiven many a faux pas.
While many of us share tendencies, these tendencies are filtered through our own individual experiences. He told me he didn't love me, that he never felt anything but anger towards me. I presumed that there was an unspoken rule that females were not welcome at our gatherings and I never challenged it. I feel the relationship could survive and thrive if the truth is known about this. I never really pitied him because of the condition. I am losing hope, but at least I'm getting out of bed. He's super high functioning and really cool.
Then I'll just let stuff build and build and build up inside of me, and then all of a sudden, without any warning, I'll lash out, because I can't possibly hold anymore stuff inside. They do not deliberately set out to hurt anyone. It reads to me like he would have been a bad mate, aspie or not, based on his regard to you. I didn't even stop to think about having me time a lot and my homework ended up getting neglected. He may have a few unresolved worries about his feeling of security as a boyfriend. We blasted emails back and forth several times the next day.
I hated the idea of dances and I disliked clubs - relating them to negative childhood experiences. Yes, I have been known to flip like a switch. That is not to say there aren't problems--there are frequencies of bonding that we won't ever be able to tune into together. Any more advice would be welcomed and appreciated. This will likely trigger a complete withdrawal. The word girlfriend was never spoken.