The solution must be based on the principle of equality. Bollywood star Dharmendra with sons Sunny and Bobby Deol Having disagreements But not all women subscribe to the same view. There is the question of a huge generation gap and also cultural issues in perspective of modern day inter cultural marriages. I am having problems with my wife; we were supposed to have a life together, but now she brought her mother to Iive with us along with her son with two pets a dog and cat. Could you live with your own parents—or your in-laws for a few weeks? But with enough communication and understanding these disadvantage can easily be solved. It was on this visit that Jethro gave Moses the advice that we discussed earlier. Moreover, as a adult child, we have to take care of our parents.
Living with parents is difficult even when we are teenagers, imagine what the scenario would be after becoming fully grown adults and being married too! I always suggest finding roommates for people that are interested in it. Another one is the control of the household. What takes the cake is living with them post-marriage. When you think you are being mistreated, you should first take it up with your husband and let him handle it for you. Rather than shame, I think it is glory. We got to see each other every week and when a real need arose we knew we could count on each other for help.
One way to honor your in-laws especially is to let them know how much you love your spouse, their child. Now that's not a very good thing in marriage life. I totally agree with you — cutting down living expenses is probably the best way to pay down debt after college. Taking care of 4 parents while staying together under one roof it's hard. With that being said, be appreciative to the people who help you. They all went to outstanding universities and graduated with almost no debt.
Conflict should be a stepping-stone to growth. Carve out private time: You should have private time with your spouse either in the house or outside the house. Do not feel that it is your task to change them. I can understand if you've bought a house and have to stay with parents or in-laws temporarily while it's being renovated. So now we all live together and have many pets, but we do not feel crowded. But being disabled there are somethings obviously I cannot do on my own such as drive. It is important for the married couple to have an independent life and relationship together, but living with extended family members can strengthen bonds within the family.
Most people I have seen that talk about moving home seem to have parents who either don't respect their privacy or treat them like children again such as walking into the bedroom to announce dinner is ready. Going to visit grandmom was a treat, not a daily part of life. I love you, and I want to help you, but I must do what I believe is right for my wife and me. It's just hard when you have to enforce them. Weekly outings and periodic getaways out of town should be the norm. Equal treatment of both sets of parents must be maintained.
Pick and choose areas where you are good and build goodwill. Accentuate their positive qualities and encourage honor. However my cousin and his wife live with their parents after they get married for they can not afford to buy a house now. In practice, this means that our letters, telephone calls, and visits must indicate our commitment to the principle of equality. The fact that your husband has lived on his own as did mine might put strain on your relationship too, as he acquiesces some freedoms he is used to, which might not seem like a big deal to you because you're used to living with your parents. If the son is a job holder and is in a distant place he surely has to take his wife along.
I pay rent and help out around the house, and even buy a few extra groceries now and then. I don't see very many downsides to this way of life. If you have loving parents that respect your a married couple then its ok. Or with our great Indian culture - which is invoked every time in a discussion of this nature. I must give some credit to them as well.
Also, I don't know if their offer is really so much of them wanting to help you two out financially, as it is may be an unconscious difficulty they have with letting you go. It can become a real source of conflict, and far more difficult to bear when opinions clash on a daily basis. Stories like yours are the reason that I spend so much time writing on this site. Imagine that when you're about 60-70 years old, do you want to live on your own, do everything by yourself? Families had to live together to make it. She is considered to be under the care of her father before marriage and her husband takes over the responsibility after marriage.